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Boom

Just everything is crap ... be

adult, or will be, is absolutely sucks ...
I am totally stressed: professional work, driving, tuition, part-time job ...
I do not know how long I have not drawn more decent, the stack of unread manga to grow for a good book or a novel I need almost a year ...
And when I did the last time a story / FF / an OS (on) wrote?
some point in the middle ages, I suppose ...

And then I learn that I can I do in the first 4-6 weeks my theory test and my first driving lesson ... Hello! I want my license!
Also, when I then long time would probably first have a car, because you can survive in this shitty world, yes only God damn money ...
And some people are so ... Nargh!
stupid, idiotic, get their money pushed heaps in the butt and do not even know what it is like to have no money, selfish, immature ... stupid people> o>

When did you got the last time you thought, great, what a strange beautiful day and then waiting all day without exception over the moon? ...

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Gomen

Sorry, had lately not much desire / time, purely write here.

But that's changing now ^ - ^ Soon I write here again! ^ ^

Otherwise:

Check out my tumblr: http://kikoro.tumblr.com/

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Sweets for my sweet ...

Valentines day

Yay! Just finished making my Valentines-choclate!! I'm so happy, Sayuki sent me this awesome chocolate from Japan, thanks to that my presents are now pink. ..i really miss all that wonderfull stuff that you can get only in Japan, and I miss not being small...

Someday, I want to make Chocolate for someone special - wow, I kinda feel like a 50ies housewife saying that....
...well till than i guess my friends wont mind the treat...

And I now that im not the only one alone... which reminds me of Glees Valentines Episode, soooo cute!!! Poor Kurt...

By the way. yesterday what my fist shooting with a professional model and photographer, it was awesome!
Zhe pictures can be found here: http://www.facebook.com/photos.php?id=129039347147187 # / functions.php aid = 56 172 & id = 129,039,347,147,187

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resolutions for 2011










~ 2011 ~

- 20 pounds off
- save money (100 €)
- 500 + KT reach
- more manga scans read
- more anime look
- Izaya cosse
- read
- better in school are
- are ordinary
- drawing practice
- license get
- learn to play guitar
- better in English, English are
- To-do list to get ready

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[...] I am just looking just someone who

... wants to be there for me
... which is interested in me
... who love me gaaaaaaaaaaaaaanz
doll ... I'm not the matter
... who wants to hug me
... the honest to be my friend wants
... listening to me
... I mean what the
... of my feelings for interested
... who listens to me and I do not feel hate
... sso accepts me as I am

Where are you?

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Pain ... It hurts

Never let it be more, someone else would be interested in me and my feelings ...
No way!
I'm depressed for days, oppress me things, but nobody will look at the idea to ask.
Either one is just angezickt or ignored. Of each.
How could I now go badly or that I have problems that Beals is me, do not care.
And if it is then told, again you get angry or someone said that we should not do so ... Or both.
Well thank you very much.

I ask all people at least, even if I get no answers.
Then people remember at least that I'm concerned and that they are not unimportant.
one probably, but I'm too nice and too trusting, and is in fact the no small matter ...

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Ayane

The sheet was cold in their hands.
Snft she ran her fingertips over the cool silk and sighed deeply, while a further isolated tear ran down her cheek and left a dark stain on the fine fabric.

The only people you could trust, one was itself

She had once learned and are learning the body must.
And it was worse than any physical pain. A narrow beam
shallow Mndeslichtes fell through the half-opened windows and turned up their miserable form in warm light.
Ayane curled herself up, put on her knees and wrapped his arms about as she once again shaken by their grief was.

He had lied to her and broke her heart, his promise and trust.
right now, where they thought he was different. Especially now that she doubted not even look at themselves and the world.

Why was a promise only a promise, when you said "I promise"? Why
ended every conversation again and again in the same silence?

you knew from the beginning that it would be difficult would.
But she had thought, hoped, always believed it would would be better.
If they would change.
But she was not the only one that had to change ...

Nobody could they and their feelings . Understand
No one wanted.
was interested, in reality no one was going in it.
If she was sad, she was given. Who cares why?

The picture on the wall above it hung askew.
your hair fell confused face. Her eyes were swollen
, her head as empty as her eyes.
thousands of questions without answers, a heart without feelings, the love of her life away ...
She was so misunderstood, so left alone, so confused and so ... hated? Not important? Superfluous?

The face buried deep down in her pillow, she cried out with the storm in competition.



Subaru

His stomach grumbled, it was ice cold and his clothes were torn and broken.
Aoi had kicked him under the Voewand, he should buy, because of the refrigerators would be virtually empty.
But probably he had again locked in the bathroom and ...
Shaking his head, Subaru went across the street, his hands buried deep in the pockets of his tattered jeans.

If life is only a means of purpose, you have no energy left - then give up.

That was his new motto was advised since all wrong.
love was simply not possible and only meant sadness.
So why should he ...?

You'll never understand me ... Therefore I'll go my own way. The way of solitude

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Lalalala, life is beautiful

... at least? unless you come to think ....


Sooo, now I'm in my second Week of the course on make-up artist. I am really amazed at how quickly you learn and better when you work so focused ... even though I'm still very stupid mistake ...
The 6 hours a day are more than enough, then I'm getting messed up. But I am strictly indeed an ...
I really hope that I can make it even my money, because it gives me an amazing amount of fun! When I'm in my course is not on how quickly time passes, only when is off.
I am also glad that I am good with Sabine (my boss) understand, we are quite on the same wavelength and she always asks me about Lolita and so and also said I should really sleep be styled come ^ ^
Fortunately, I had until now only very dear and patient models, which makes the whole thing too much, and I was ready not done well that I had someone disfigured. The Basics
we have and by now the fun starts tomorrow so right ^ ^ Trend Makeup, Glitter, and all he Hochtzeitsmakeup frills ^___^

Milky way, Chris, made me addicted! Hach, is the soooo cute .. ///// from now I'll lay siege to it every Friday so I can indulge you with my new addiction ...
I admire real, she is soo sweet and really strong (but unfortunately I appear to be taken too seriously ... hoffentlch they will not soon that annoying ...), not to mention their sewing and Bastelkü ; sweetest!

On Thursday's H & M shopping Lavin ... if by then there was ... Well now, I do not always see that, but only ma would be nice ...

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• Liar's Smile •










solitude.
agony.
pain.
lonely.
broken.
time.
past.
love.
hate.
you.

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Loniless & Solitude







loneliness


You say I'm too seriously and would always complain
But you know wrong
already clear, for
show I also fierce, angry or extremely angry
Am I just simply Although cool
's no longer bothers me ...

I have pride and love of discipline and order, but my
Fingers are too fat

And therefore I do not understand what do you mean "He is great!"
I'm here all alone
and complain 'about me


loneliness loneliness loneliness

Please find me soon

you say my taste just potatoes, but you yourself just
Soba Pasta and eat you. Am I right?
If my kitchen is dirty and extinguished the light,
to find my place be?
And again comes the


loneliness loneliness loneliness


My heart opens to you. I am free and fly to you.
And just because you exist, I exist now.

My view is not limited and my eyes not only my smile fixed
disappeared and never came back
All are only afraid of my face strict
The smile that went by, but only through you restore
piece by piece
More and more

.
..
...
....
...
..
. You're implying that I'm

too serious and that I always grumble about things
But you're wrong about that.
It's understandable, because even if I
look grim, furious or just extremely angry
I'm unapproachable.
Although I do not mind it ...

I've got pride and I love discipline and order, but
my fingers are too fat.
And so
I don't understand what you mean by "He's got a(n) good/easy life"
I'm all alone
and so I'm complaining about

Solitude
Solitude
Solitude
Please find me soon.

You're implying that the only food I like are potatoes, but you're the same
with your Soba and Pasta. I'm right, am I not?
If my kitchen gets dirty and the lights are off
Where's my home supposed to be?
And again there's

Solitude
Solitude
Solitude

My heart's opening for you. I'm free and so I'm flying to you.
And just because of you existance... I'm able to exist, too.

I'm not narrow-minded and my eyes are not frozen.
It's just that my smile disappeared and never returned to me again
Everyone's scared of my face yesterday.
The smile that faded away is coming back just because of you ...
Steb by step ...
Ever More ...

Translation by Jasushie (YouTube)

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€ Hav Fun

The promised report of 30 October to 01 November






Saturday, the 30th November.
in Dusseldorf.

It was an exciting morning. Finally, I had
Jule not seen in a long time.
But it paid off the reunion of all the more. At least I have
the very poor stormy embrace ...^^
It was then also directly in the city that I've really missed! After a short
have hangers in NipponBookstore I say not, 70 € for the OCS verballert Durarara! Article ...
And I had planned to spend no money for Japanese manga ...
DRRR! containing
>___\u0026lt; With 70 € less (I had to pick up more then 50 €) we went to eat delicious sushi first, then into the deli and the German Mangalden. Sitting on the church steps, we finally beglubscht our goods. Then went
's purely in the center of Düsseldorf, but hardly in business. After
in the Old City two of these very plain painted people who do not move, hit, and I photographed them, I can take a picture of me with a man on stilts!
On the Rhine, we were sitting quite a long time and have only gequasselt.
Then we started on the way home ...

... and met but actually Jürgen Milski based on a stage that we had already noticed in the morning, gave a live concert and finally gave autographs ♥
Then it's a great Gerwinnspiel in which we were given a cell phone.
We had only green-painted faces dancing on the stage while we were accepted. The video appeared on facebook.
The Statue of Liberty had in fact B-Day!
We then picked up our phone.

And then, uff, a long way, a long wait and a cheap mobile phone (= o =) later, we went home really
xD And I almost forgot my box at the main station.
And I've lost the 50 € and had to pick up another 20> __ \u0026lt;

Sunday, 31 November.
in Solingen.

On the RuNeKo!
No, wait ... The
unfortunately was absolute crap!
bad cosplays, poor stands ...
Fortunately, we have to pay any money = P
And before all these hardships = o =
But we were able again to Dusseldorf.
We were lucky - it was Sunday opening!
So we were comfortable eating sushi in the new restaurant in the J-mile x3
Mjam!
Then we walked a bit around and bought hair color!
spent the rest of the evening with Julia, shared files, bleached our hair and played Treasure Isle, before we recorded late into the night (Alois x Ciel ♥) and then sleep gingenn.

Monday 1 November.
in Ratingen.

ice skating!
came after a turbulent ride on a bicycle riiiiiiiiiiiesigen bike rental, we at the ice rink.
I was unfortunately grottig and did everything >___\u0026lt;
Then There Were just spoiled Zoff .___.
And when we got back, I had to go on, back to Dortmund T__T


Conclusion: 3 wonderful days of fun!

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Because

Blackster leaning against a lamp post, noticed the girl does not want the rain drenched by the roadside sat, knees drawn, arms wrapped around it.
He ran his hand over his tie.

"Why did you kill yourself?"

"Because I hate myself and hate grew.
Because I felt bad, and the frustration was unbearable.
Because no one has asked and no one wanted to understand.
Because no one knew an answer and nobody wanted to help.
Because loneliness and attachment are two different things "

Blackster reached for his cigarette-won, with the mouth one out and lit.

" And why did you now killed ?

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exchange party

Yesterday we had at the Jasi and Babs - I've noticed there Soviets Loita-first-party exchange of Vienna.
And it was really great, but caotisch great.
we have started at 17.30, since then There Were Once coffee and - very delicious - cakes for all, then were suitcases full of clothes, shoes and knick-knacks Gelert presented and angpriesen and then in the next run wild distributed throughout the apartment and tried on. In the third passage was then traded and exchanged, and even if natürlic not get any people could have what he wanted, but all went home happy. However, we have
miscalculated the enormous amount of time, because we really wanted to go away after the party yet, but since we have exchanged over 7 hours and traded, are we all just went home. And once again I am extremely grateful for the Nachtubahn! Night taxi with the luggage would have been not really comfortable ...
Bottom line: I'm looking forward now to the Next!

Here is a list of my Erungenschaften:
colorful socks - free from Dani ^ _ ^
pink cardigan
Bunny Pink Plush Rocking Horse
Meta
red apple white rock
Ane to Imoto White Rock
AP Cutsew
pink Gltzergeldbörse
white ribbon brooch
Gltzer Flower Bead Bracelet

... and all for 40 € ...

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Greetings from Mallor. .. uh, Ratingen
Today was an amusing day!
Why?

First, I'm in the OCS for 70 € DRRR how stupid! article bought!
Jule And the new Kuro-art book and a PH-book and a kink -KKM-Maga!
Then we met Jürgen Milski have live, get an autograph, was the Statue of Liberty, the was later seen on facebook and get paid to have a cell phone ...

And I've lost 50 € uu

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Yin blessing in disguise ...! Be quiet! ...











>/////\u0026lt;



>/////\u0026lt;

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Who am I?









Who am I? - LaFee


I can not sleep
My head is so chock full of you
no moon for us
Black is the night
And you dream with me

I do not get eye
I'm so afraid to miss you otherwise
I do not want to dream
No dream can be so beautiful deserves
as this one moment

What I have you?
Am I up really worth it?

Who am I?
That especially I'm in your heart - why?
Who am I?
That especially I am the one you love?
Why can not I be here next to you?
Why do you want me?

was in front of you all day long And now I have nothing
every second - with you in my prayers
geh'n thousand suns on
I that they never
perish without you

What I have you earned?
Am I up really worth it?

Who am I? That
now I'm in your heart - why?
Who am I?
That especially I am the one you love?
Why can not I be here next to you?
Why do you want me?
Why am I the one?
Why do you say to me
"I love you"?

Who am I?
That especially I'm in your heart - why?
Who am I?
That especially I am the one you love - why?

Who am I?
That especially I'm in your heart - why?
Who am I?
That especially I am the one you love - why?

Why am I the one?
Why am I the one?
Why am I the one?
Why do you love me?

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mixed feelings

job-less

So now I'm really my job terminated. I'm going this week and the next work there, but then it's over. And I'm really glad all the smoke, the negative attitude of my boss and the racist / misogynistic / homophobic (= just stupid) comments of some regulars sit with me really nice and slow. Also, I really do not want to board waiters (and certainly not for 6 € per hour).
strange is that my boss rarely been so nice and understanding was, when I told him that I quit (he even thanked him in advance that I I said ..).
But somehow I howl to be mute. It's so strange, pötzlich hang back so in the air. Well, next Thursday I have a job interview because of the make-up artists share price, which I want to visit, I'm so again what to do ...
.. and at least I'm now more often then time to zugehn Lolita stammtisch ...

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Mistakes ...

error does it take to learn from it.
You can not undo, but you can repeat it forever.
life is a mistake.
loved ones is a mistake.
Everything is nothing, nothing brings what.
work Why?
Why be sad?
Why not just enjoy? Why not just live
?
Man but just want an enjoyable life that you can happily spend time with true friends.
No black holes into which one falls,
the desire to kill himself ...
No manic depression and no feeling of emptiness.

They want to be a contractor, not a doll ... No being
without feeling ... Only rational thinking ...
Man just want to be myself, laugh, forfeited his addictions ...

LEB €.

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hair dounuts and wiener Cupcakes

What I learned this weekend's new:

• My hair is long enough to provide them with one of these Haardounuts hockzustecken ^___^
  
• A dear friend of mine (with which I am now able to take a long time again) will remain in Vienna longer than I thought (until next year!)
  
• There is a Cupcakegeschäft since September in Vienna (www.cupcakes-wien.at)
  
• The cupcakes are there urlecker (I have one after eight and a chestnut-bought cupcake) and total business sweet!
  
• I now know that I will not be until the end of my days waitress wants but will begin training as a stylist.
  
• Shirley Temple is 1 a very talented, sweet child star; 2 the most wonderful Knidermoden-lable in the world.
  
• LablePink The Japanese House (from the 80s? 90?), There are still, and they're still the same adorable things like the olden times (and they are more expensive than most Lolita -labels).
  
  
  
  ... so many positive discoveries, all in all a good weekend ^ _ ^
  

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Trust Me

N whom trust and who not?
liar well and who speaks the truth?

Who can one guarantee for that the people that will mean something, not exactly the ones who take advantage of this status and lie to you even more?
Who can you trust? Who uses
you out?